| And if I have faith that can move mountains, but have not love, I am nothing... |
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[27 Nov 2004|06:17pm] |
HEY... i got new screennames...
LIVEJOURNAL: xone_true_tunex
AIM: onextruextune
EMAIL: onextruextune@yahoo.com
alright so now its your job to completely forget about this sn and go to my other one.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY LINDSEY!! I dedicated an entry to you on my new lj.
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| Oh but baby it's cold outside... |
[25 Nov 2004|10:13pm] |
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mood |
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 bored |
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I just got done laughing my PANTS off. Yeah, we watched Elf. That's a fun movie.
So Thanksgiving. Man do i have an interesting family. Everybody gets really annoyed with my uncle who does drugs and likes to talk about bodily functions. My grandma is losing her mind, and of course it wouldnt be Thanksgiving if my mom werent an hour late because she hadnt even gotten in the shower at 1:30 when we were supposed to start eating. But it's cool. It's all good.
Yeah, so my grandma can't think anymore. Well, it's weird. She's always been one of those people who thinks they have something wrong with them so much that they start displaying those symptoms and never get any better because they are so convinced that they have a horrible disease that's doing this to them. That probably didnt make any sense, but oh well. I dont know how else to put it. She says she sees little girls and babies running around and when she tries to touch them her hand goes right through them. So she got drugs for these hallucinations. Well, for a while she's had the shakes really bad in her hands and stuff. The doctor's think she has DIPS -Drug Induced Parkinson's Syndrom- from taking the stuff for hallucinations. She also said the doctor's told her she has Alzheimer's or however you spell it. So my mom said she talked to her a like a day before she found that out and she was fine, she could actually carry on a conversation. Well the next day she hears the news and suddenly, she cant remember our names. Well she can, but it takes her a few minutes. And it takes her forever to remember what things are called like... beans or... pie. I dont know, its crazy. I'm pretty sure she's just convinced herself that something is horribly wrong with her. I still worry about her though. Just pray for her, that never hurts. Maybe she'll regain a little of her sanity soon... when she stops taking enough medicine for New York City.
Well anyway, i'll quit talking bad about my family. It makes me feel bad. WELL... hope you guys had an awesome Thanksgiving. Hopefully you remembered to button back your pants when you left the table.
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| BANG -me shooting the computer- |
[25 Nov 2004|12:43am] |
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Im frustrated with the stupid colors of this stupid thing so just deal with its weirdness while i get some sleep. I'll fix it later.
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| WO-OO-WO-OO... YOU GOT THE BEST OF MY LOVE |
[24 Nov 2004|11:38pm] |
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mood |
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 lethargic |
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Woo i had a nice little venting session yesterday. It was well needed, though.
AH.. WATCH OUT! BEHIND YOU!
Yea that was completely random. I spent the night at my little cousin's house last night (Elizabeth- five years old). And all I did was watch movies, eat, play Libby-Lu (pretty much put on poorly applied makeup), and watch Elizabeth dress up in costumes and dance to Hilary Duff. I'm telling you... I was 7 years old the rest of the day.
So then tonight I'm all YES CHURCH! Because we actually get a break from dance for Thanksgiving. So i go to church and what do i find? Not anyone else! Yea, i seemed to have forgotten that we dont have church the wednesday before thanksgiving. Man. I'M SO SMART.
Yea so i get home and HAMILTON calls and he's all "Hey I'm going to the mall with my sister and Kelli, wanna go?" So i go of course because NO ONE turns that down. So we hang at the mall. Then we hang at Books-a-Million. Yea, needless to say... we're cool.
I think i still have the mindset of a 7 year old, so forgive me if this entry is slightly unbearable.
Uh, so yeah... good night.
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| Another Random Entry |
[23 Nov 2004|02:05pm] |
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mood |
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 contemplative |
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I hate when things become routine. It confuses me. Nothing goes wrong, but then again, nothing goes especially wonderful. I don't know whether to be happy or what. I know things cant go wonderfully all the time, but it would be nice if they did.
I miss my friends. I was sitting here in computer trying to figure out what i can do for an hour and a half, and i decided to update myself in all the livejournal happenings. I decided i hadn't really talked to Kelli in ten years so i read hers and it made me sad. For no particular reason or anything, it just made me realize that we never get to hang out anymore. I miss you guys. I talk to Christy a lot because she's in all my classes. Actually, I pretty much listen to Christy a lot. I never talk. I dont understand how a person's mind could be so blank. It frustrates me. Sometimes I do think of things, but i just figure they're not interesting and forget about them. But really, mainly, I just listen to everybody. Maybe i need sleep. Whenever i get to sleep on Saturdays or whatever i feel a lot cooler. All the other days im just a loser. No im just kidding, sort of. I just keep everything to myself. I dont know why... thats just how it is. I think a lot. I think about random things to myself and never say them. I dont know why. Like right now. A million things are going around in my head i just dont know if i want to share them or how to put them or... i dont know.
My mom took a second job and she's never going to be home. On the weekends. That should help us pay the bills. She's thinking about taking my dad to court. She says she doesn't enough child support. She said she only gets about $200 a month when some people she knows get 700. She's seriously thinking about it, and i dont like it. He just got married and he's SO happy with everything happening in his life, i dont want something like that to interfere. And a lawyer will cost mom like a thousand dollars or something and.. I really just dont think it's worth it. At all.
Things with Josh are going pretty good. Christy made me realize that i never say anything about him either so i thought i'd let you guys know what's happening there. Basically, he's going through some issues right now. He feels like he cant hear God much or something like that. He was so incredibly on fire before that this has just gotten him down a little. Things are ok, though. We talk on the phone and stuff. Most of the time he's really tired from basketball or something and doesnt talk too much. I do get worried sometimes, though. To be honest. He told me he goes through little periods like this where he just doesnt feel like being really into all the relationhsip stuff. He still likes me and he's still my boyfriend and everything, its just he's not as... enthusiastic as he was before (related to the whole God thing). But he told me its just a phase and not to worry about it and he's sorry. Everything's fine though. I just hardly ever talk about him to you guys because either nothing really interesting has happened due to this phase, or i was afraid if i actually said all this stuff that people would think we were breaking up or something (which is not the case). And also...
Well i have this weird thing where i dont talk about problems because if i dont i forget about them. Like just now. I didnt even realize I was upset at all about mom and the whole work and court thing until just now talking about it. I guess everybody does that though. I just now started to actually think about.. my life in general right now. I don't realize how i really feel about things because i never give myself a chance to actually think about them. I mean the thoughts go through my head but unless i talk about them its like they're not even happening. I usually just dismiss everything so i can be carefree or something. I dont like to feel like i have troubles, even if i do. I dont know. Im weird.
I'm sad about Amber Waldrep, too. We became really good friends during MCHC and the STARS retreat (which was awesome). I just wish i got to see her. But she's a Sparkman loser so.. No im just kidding. All the Sparkman people that I know that arent bad and immoral and stuff are SO COOL. Like, I could be completely myself around Amber and her friends. She's the coolest person. I felt really comfortable around her. And it felt really good because most of the time, I'm not like that around people. I dont act how I really am or want to or something. Whatever.
Well i think thats all. I dont know. We need to have a spend the night rave thing soon. Thats the only way I get to really say everything going through my head.
Love you guys
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| HOLY COW! |
[03 Oct 2004|11:41pm] |
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mood |
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 jubilant |
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This feels so strange. It's been so long! It's long I've been on vacation for months in some far off place... like Aruba... where they don't have livejournals.
It's probably not the best idea to update for the first time in 17 years when im in this crazy delirious mood. But I really don't care, so you can get over it! ha just kidding. Wont happen again.
So now I have to think of an interesting story that i can tell. hmm. Ah yes. At about... Lord only knows when last night I hear, "Oh, Brittany! OH Brittany! IT HURTS! oh... OOOH!" As i awake from my pleasant sleep to hear the screams of my mother, who is apparently VERY distressed and obviously about to die, the only thing that seemed logical to do was, of course, turn to the other side and try to go back to sleep.(?) Well, this doesn't work because it would seem that going to sleep is quiet hard with someone screaming your name in great agony. So finally I become slightly aware of what's happening and realize -oh, Mom's in pain... i should probably go see about that- The next thing I remember is Mom using her arms to drag herself across the floor into my room. (Still screaming) So finally I say "MOM... what's going on?" Well it would seem that my mom had a leg cramp. As she explained it, her foot was twisted, her toes stiff, and she couldnt move either of them. I try to explain that that is what happens when you have a leg cramp, but she wasnt really paying attention. So I tell her to stretch her legs and feet around so she can work the cramp out. As she does this, she continues to scream "OH, IT HURTS! it hurts too bad, it's not working!" Once the OH!s and the AH IT HURTS!s finally died down to a bearable level, she starts screaming, "Oh, now the other legs cramping up!" I tell her to keep stretching. Once again, the volume lowers, and all i remember from this point is falling asleep as Mom was still laying on the floor in my room. It was kinda funny, but i felt kind of bad, because i didnt catch on that she was actually in pain until she crawled into my room. Who knows how long she had been screaming before i realized through my half-asleep state... that she was screaming. Hmm.. yea. I'm an intelligent one.
So that's my story. Who knows when the next time i update will be. I;m a little tired. I guess I'll talk to you cool kids later.
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| SO random... so mean... so beautiful... |
[27 Jul 2004|06:00pm] |
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Arent you excited? I know, i can sense it. I just made your day by writing these words. SO exciting.
Ok, enough. Today we went and sang at the Von Braun. It gave me the urge to dance. I was very happy. Then i went with Christy to Company camp and watched all the dances. They're so good. That REALLY made me wanna dance. I was about to just break out and bust a move in the middle of em. I've missed dance so much over the summer. Every once in a while i just have to leap or find myself dancing in my head to every song i hear... actually i do that all the time, but more now. I cant wait to start back.
But school? not so much. It will be nice seeing the people, but thats about it.
Christy's out of the shower. I'm at her house at the moment. I'm finished updating, actually. I'll see you kids later.
Keep it real. Dont do anything i wouldnt do. Smoking kills. Stay out of trouble. The end.
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| Wich-AH! I just went ALL kung-fu on you. |
[08 Jul 2004|11:10pm] |
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mood |
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Yea! i LOVE that song! |
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music |
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this one |
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This is my favorite song... i have decided. I will share it with you now.
Parachute
There we stand about to fly
Peeking down over land
Parachute behind
What was that moment for which we live?
Without a parachute about to dive
I find myself convincing
Blindly falling faster
How easy
Know the place I'm leaving
And the rest is just gone
Oh the adoration
But how much strength does it take
For exploration
For split decision or
are you stronger to remain
I find myself convincing
Blindly falling faster
How easy
Know the place I'm leaving
and the rest is just gone
it crept on me
ignored all my pleas
beggin to leave
no justice to name me
Fell out of the sky
cease it to be
without a reply
gravity fails me
and when i awoke
Knew what was real
Hope to convince you
Lies they all torture me
Opened the door
knew it was me
finally realized
Parachute over me
-Guster
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| I walk left, you walk right... |
[04 Jun 2004|10:21pm] |
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mood |
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ecstatic |
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I. am sitting> in Christy*s "chair; I have. decided to put, all the :wrong Punctuation (in this )update? Today! i sat and }folded. clothes, a WHOLE :lot of clothes. About & ten loads? Let me (tell) you "it was the most! funfilled ^ day ;I've had in, a while! Then i [sat around] until Christy called, and Decided- to >invite me to/spend the ?night! That was exciting? So< I watched^ A Knight's Tale until? Kelli Christy and Jessica =pulled up ?and took me! to Christy's house. After-- a while We took ,a walk.
I wont elaborate any further until later cuz im afraid Christy's already pulled out too much of her hair reading this... besides they need the computer, so... PEACE OUT.
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| Then it all falls, and everything's revealed... |
[03 Jun 2004|04:15pm] |
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Summer summer summer. Today, i did nothing. blah -makes sideways face- Yesterday was pretty cool, i guess. At dance we got a star on our trio... the third time. But hey, who's counting. Then church. Hardly anybody was there... Gulf shores trip and it being Memorial Day week probably had something to do with it. After church me and Kelli went to Wal-Mart with mom. We rode around on the bikes! I felt so mischievious. Me and Kelli... yeah. We're quite the rebels. After that we went to sonic. We split a lot of stuff. Very tasty.
-randomly busts out the break-dancing-
Kristen is in Gulf Shores. I dont like it. There's no one to keep me entertained at home. Kind of shows what it will be like when she goes to college. That's so weird.
NEXT WEEK IS RECITAL! I'm excited. I dont know about you. These next two weeks are gonna be crazy. Cause after recital... COMMUNITY CHANGERS. I know. So exciting.
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| New colors... |
[29 May 2004|10:09pm] |
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Amber! Your bracelet inspired me.
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| Know you cant control yourself any longer... |
[29 May 2004|08:42pm] |
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mood |
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 crazy |
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Ok, I'm gonna tell you a story.
Once upon a time, there was this girl. Her name was Brittany. She had a pretty nice life. This one day, she woke up, and it was SATURDAY- her favorite day of the week... except for Sunday, Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, and Friday. When she woke up, she found that it was a wonderful day, except for the fact that she was extremely bored. There was nothing to do in her house. So, she went and played on the computer, until she changed her mind. She actually wanted to watch tv. Then, her DAD came over! Oh, how exciting. So she went with her dad and mom to BURGER KING. Yes, i know, how could the story possibly get any better? Oh, but it does. After Burger King they went to Wal-Mart. Yea. She was excited, too. After buying stuff for her sister, Kristen's, apartment, it was off to KOHL's! DUCK, this is the best story in the world. Her parents shopped for Kristen a wall clock, and Brittany searched for clothing. Her dad said that since she was sick on Easter and didnt get to go out to eat with the family, that he owed her an item of CLOTHING! Heart-warming, isnt it. During her search, Brittany found that Soffe shorts were on sale- 3 for $18! But soon, confusion comes her way... there is a shirt that fits, also! Oh, no. What to do... She took her problem to her father and- BAM! Her dad says she can get the shorts AND the shirt! YES! I know! It's amazing! After she wiped the tears of joy from her face, everyone left the store and went to Chick-fil-A for some ICE CREAM! Woah-ho-ho! There, Brittany got her 4th ice cream cone this week. It's a record. After this little excursion, everyone decided to take it to the house. There, the exciting day came to an end.
THE END
Moral: When you cross a chicken with a saxophone, you're bound to get a craving for apple juice.
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| Rescue me... |
[21 May 2004|09:46pm] |
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I'M AT AMBER's HOUSE. WOO-freakin-YEA! We're gonna rave in a minute.
So far we've practiced our trio... hopefully we'll remember all of that thing... gone to Terry's Pizza... withOUT christy cuz shes lame... and talked to Paden (Kelli's really cool guy). OO and we jumped on the trampoline, but there was nasty stuff on it and UFO's (lightning bugs) so we didnt.
hmmm... RAVE! CRAP! BYE!
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| Just bust a move... |
[15 May 2004|09:44pm] |
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mood |
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bored |
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So last night. Well, yesterday at about 5:30 or 6 i decided to take a little nap. When i woke up from my "nap", it was 2 in the morning. Hmmm... lost a few hours there. I wasnt sure what to do. I wasnt tired or anything, but it was 2... in the morning... So i just watched the countdown on VH1 until 4. Then i played the Sims until 6. I decided i didnt want to be dead tired tonight, so then i went back to sleep until around 8. It was the strangest night ive ever had. I think...
A lot of things happened... but i forget all the specifics. Sparkman is the worst school ive ever been to, but Kelli got a guy, so its all good. And... im not sure about the rest.
im done. didnt have to much to say. Dang. I'm boring. Blah. blah blah blah. blah BLAH blah. Ok im finished. Im out. Love.
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| Dare you to move... dare you to lift yourself, lift yourself up off the floor... |
[10 May 2004|08:47pm] |
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mood |
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cheerful |
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What up homies. Today was a fantastic day. I was just in a good mood, i guess... there wasnt anything special about today.
I history we're studying World War II. I must say, war bores me. I mean, i just dont get very interested by it. But thats ok. -talks like Coach Henson- I'sall gooood.
So in PE we ran the mile. Me and Jessica (Barnes) got like 9:49. Ha. We walked a lot. All we had to do was get under 12 minutes. Some girls in my class got 16 minutes. Hmmm...
Choir was slightly frustrating. We're getting to that critiquing point, and nobody really pays attention. We really need to. We have a show in, what, 3 days? Yea... we're gonna do GREAT.
Dance was fun. Hot and sweaty, but it was alright.
That's about it guys. I'm gone.
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| Pop-ta-Pop-ta-Pop-ta-Pop MuSIC... |
[06 May 2004|07:33pm] |
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mood |
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crazy |
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I'm in such a raving mood. Holy crap. MUSIC.
-RAVES-
So yesterday. School was cool, i think. After dance i wasnt in the best mood -for some unknown reason- . Mom bought a proof for each of my classes yesterday. They were great... at sucking. The way i had my makeup was just way too dark, i looked like i didnt have any eyes. Plus in jazz pictures, i was having a horrible off-day and couldnt do anything right. But anyway. So mom stopped at the mall to buy some vitamins. I stayed in the car and listened to the radio for about 2 minutes when i just had this urge to turn it off and sing. Not any particular song, just a bunch of notes. Make my own song, just to get my emotions out. I did it for like 30 minutes, but then my mom came back, and i stopped. It worked, too. At church i was in a great mood.
Today was cool. School was normal... except for choir. We went to the band room. Man. Scary place. We had our own little cool circle where we got to know each other.. ha. That was fun.
Well.... I'm really excited. I dont even know why.
Let it burn.
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| Keep on whisperin in my ear, tell me all the things that i wanna hear... |
[03 May 2004|09:25pm] |
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mood |
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quixotic |
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That's what i like about you.
So. I almost died today in tap. Not really, i just hate allergies. They make my asthma 10 times worse. I walk up starts and im like -gaasp-wheeze-cough-wheeze-gasp- It's annoying.
Today was school. Only 2 weeks left after this one, which makes me REALLY happy, but then really sad. Kristen graduates. Oh poo. That wasnt supposed to happen. Then in June she moves away. What kind of loser goes to college? Pssh... I'm gonna miss her some kind of bad.
Hmmm... thats about it. I must say... I'm a bit of a boring girl. My apologies. Much love.
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| and I starve... I starve for you |
[02 May 2004|08:03pm] |
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mood |
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cheerful |
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Yesterday was Soulstock... HOLY CRAP... it was so exciting. Who would've ever thought that a church in Lickskillet, Alabama would would have their preacher preach at this huge event and have their expressive worship team open for Audio A? HA, not me. man, thats crazy. God sure does love us. He is one really cool guy. I mean... that's amazing.
So... I'm engaged. That's right. Brittany's getting married, lol. No. I met this guy at Soulstock and after a lot of funny things happened, he was like, "Hey, you have nice teeth." So he called me Chops. And later he said, "Chops... will you marry me?" And i said, "... YEAH!" So... we're getting married.
Today was fun. I went to La Alameda with Kristen, Christy Kelli, and Candace. We ate and goofed around and spilled stuff. Then we went to the mall and Wal-Mart. Exciting? Oh yes.
When we got home, Kelli had bought self-tanner, so she came over to get Kristen to show her how to use it. Christy came along, too. So Kelli put on the self-tanner and so that it doesnt streak, she has to walk around in her underwear and a bathing suit top until it dried. My mom laughed everytime she saw her.
Guess that's it guys... love.
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| Lonely girl... |
[21 Apr 2004|09:30pm] |
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mood |
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content/dorky/frustrated |
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Mom's done with the phone, so now Brittany has the floor.
Ok, i remember thinking Sunday that i wanted to type about how awesome the worship was. I LOVE worship. I love music. I love to sing. Sometimes it frustrates me because i hear in my head what i want to sound like, then when i try, it sounds... slightly different. -sigh-
I watched Diva's Live. It made me realize how much i really love singing. Not so much singing, everyone can, but using your voice as an instrument. Knowing exactly what to do to make a certain... oh i dont know. im freakin jealous.
Confession time with Brittany. I must admit, ive been a little depressed lately. I know why... its just because i am a dork. I dont know if i want to say why... so ill just sort of explain. - takes big breath in preparation for what is to come- Have you ever felt like there's one person someone would just rather be around then you? Like someone you are really close to is closer to someone else? I dont know how to explain it. I'm just too freakin sensitive. -RAAAAAAH- Sometimes i just feel like im that old toy on the top shelf with all the dust on it or the one shoved in the closet that no one needs anymore. Like an overplayed song. It was great at first, but now you're just tired of it. You're just kinda there.
Sorry, i had to do it. I feel a lot better now. Plus this is a journal, so you're supposed to write about what you're going through. So here you go.
Chris is trying to get ahold of Kristen or something so i have to get off. Nothin but love.
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